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Hostility Management

Not every project fails because of bad tech or bad estimates. Sometimes it’s people. Politics. Fear. Sabotage. The Alchemist (PM) must spot hostility early and deal with it head-on.

Where Hostility Comes From

  • 3rd parties who see you as competition or a threat (often the Gatekeepers (3rd Parties & Blockers)).
  • Employees who fear their job is being automated away.
  • Change resisters who just don’t want disruption.
  • Internal politics — turf wars between departments.
  • Vested interests who benefit if the project stalls.

Spotting Hostility

  • Watch the vibe in kick-offs and daily calls.
  • Slow replies, sudden dissapearnces, repeated blockers, passive-aggressive comms.
  • SMEs who say “we’ll get to it” but never do.
  • Partners who drown you in process.

Rule: if it smells like resistance, treat it as resistance.

What To Do

  1. Document It

    • Every delay, every blocker, every excuse — write it down.
    • Evidence is your shield.

  2. Escalate to the Custodian Early

    • Don’t fight turf wars yourself.
    • Raise it to the Custodian (Customer KDM): “This blocker is jeopardising your outcome.”

  3. Reframe in Outcomes

    • Put hostility back in terms of outcomes/KPIs.
    • “If X doesn’t deliver this input, Y outcome cannot be signed off.”
    • Shifts the blame from you to the blocker.

  4. Use Assumption Reflex

    • “If I don’t hear from you by EOD, I’ll proceed with assumption Z.”
    • Forces a response.

  5. Timebox the Resistance

    • Convert waiting into milestones: “Firewall request submitted, 5-day SLA.”
    • Makes blockers visible and trackable.

Dealing with Sabotage

Notes

  • Stay professional, but firm.
  • You’re not here to win hearts.
  • You’re here to get outcomes signed off.

Hostility isn’t personal — it’s politics, fear, or turf. Don’t wrestle in the mud. Document, escalate, reframe, move on.

Not all hostility that comes at you comes for you. I once worked with a guy who was constantly complaining about how uncooperative I was being - even after I had gone the extra mile (outside of scope) to assist him. Months after the project ended and I'd moved on, I heard he had passed away from an aggressive terminal cancer. Most people are dealing with things we have no idea about.

Checklist

  • Watch for signs of hostility in all meetings.
  • Document every delay/blocker/excuse.
  • Escalate to the Custodian (Customer KDM) early.
  • Reframe blockers in terms of outcomes/KPIs.
  • Use assumption reflex to provoke responses.
  • Timebox resistance into visible milestones.
  • Escalate sabotage immediately with evidence.